Rant: Maternity Clothes

I'm not sure if it is purely coincidental or if it's meant to be that today's yesterday's challenge post is to rant about something. I have had something brewing in my head that seems to just intensify and this is the perfect outlet to rant about it, since surely my husband is sick of hearing it.

I think that the most ridiculous thing that ever was is maternity clothes. I have really just hit the point where I actually need maternity clothes since belly shirts and unbuttoned pants just aren't in right now. I have gone to a few stores and made some online purchases, which I thought would be pretty easy since the companies say to order in your regular size, right? Wrong. 

Disclosure: I have nothing against the stores listed, I have an issue with maternity clothes in general.

I started my maternity shopping extravaganza online at Old Navy during a 30% off sale. I read the reviews, followed suggestions from previous shoppers, ordered my regular sizes, and still got duped. I was so excited when the big package from Old Navy came and I immediately began trying things on. I bought an adorable maxi dress and I actually sized down since all the reviews said it ran really big. Ok, no problem. I usually wear a medium top but I'm only 5'1, so I went with a small for length. It's a cute dress but there are SEVEN inches of fabric on the floor when I put it on. Really, all women wearing a small from Old Navy are at least 5'8? Doubt it. Is this to compensate for the belly? If so, pregnant women wouldn't be able to walk if their bellies stuck out as far as the fabric left over is suggesting.

 

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Next up was the black nursing dress. It's a really cute, simple cotton dress that has a nursing panel in the chest. I thought I would get good use out of it this summer and into the fall once the baby is here. I tried it on and got stuck. Literally. My neck was popping out of the nursing panel and my arm was through the other other side of the panel. If this was meant to simplify nursing, then why do you need a Ph.D to figure out how to get it on? Ain't nobody got time for that!

 

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Then, I bought one pair of khakis for work. I figure that since I'll only be teaching summer school, I won't really need long pants. Well, I actually ordered these a size up just in case my hips or thighs spread. I figured they would bit a bit loose which I would prefer for right now. They look like they are painted on. Like, I can't even breathe, even with that belly panel. These are a size bigger than I usually wear and my regular pair, from the same store, still fits but I just can't deal with the belly band.

Which brings me to the next issue... the belly band. Am I wearing this thing wrong? When I sit down, it shifts and I have to rearrange my pants constantly. I teach fifth grade and it is not okay that my pants are falling down. The directions say to fold it over three times to cover the lumps from my buttons but when I fold it over three times, it looks like I'm wearing a headband. So I fold it twice and it shifts. Or I don't fold it and you can see that my pants aren't buttoned. I thought I would love this but sadly, I was mistaken.

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Then I was browsing online at Target and the selection didn't seem so bad, so I went in to try things on. Well, I didn't find anything online in the store and everything that was in the store was hideous or super simple and I had trouble justifying spending extra money on simple shirts and pants that can only be worn for a few more months. The sizes, the color combos, even the selection was sparse. I went up to a rack that had only three tanks left on it and they were XS and XL. Hmm. It wasn't all bad, though. I ended up leaving the maternity section and buying a bunch of XL 'long and lean' tanks from the Juniors section so that they would fit my belly all summer. Again, I'm normally a medium but I'm hoping to get through to at least September. These tanks were 3 for $20 so I couldn't resist. That's a deal I can't turn down and whaddya know, it's not maternity! Finally, something I can feel good about!

I guess I am just confused about maternity clothes. Shouldn't the maternity section be just like the regular clothes section, except with room for pregnant bellies? Why do I have to compromise style or comfortable fit because I'm pregnant? I'm already gaining weight, checking for stretch marks, breaking out, and sweating like a hooligan. And I'm having an easy pregnancy! I have to say that not everything is terrible but I refuse to spend a ridiculous amount of money for clothes that I can't even wear next season. Plus, with all the cute mama's in their maternity wear on Pinterest, I thought I would be totally styling for 9 months. My hopes were high. I did end up finding a couple of things but I would say that for every cute outfit I found, there were 10 hideous/ill-fitting items being left at the fitting rooms.

Seriously, I would be better off going to Homegoods and getting a frickin' table cloth.